| 1. |
the drunken radiator
Just because you are obviously some kind of gin-addled hobo doesn't mean you can't be nice and warm.
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| 2. |
the full situp
To achieve the full situp, you must begin with the genuine intention of exercising your abs and promptly fall asleep midway through the task. This position is extremely advanced and not recommended for amateur sleepers.
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| 3. |
the awkward spoon
The goal here is not so much intimacy as it is the socially uncomfortable sharing of a physical space with someone. Bonus points if your arm falls asleep but you're too embarrassed to move it.
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| 4. |
the semicircle
Tuck your tail between your legs and imagine that you are an omelet.
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| 5. |
the sunbather
The trick is to look like someone who is acting comfortable whilst also appearing extremely uncomfortable. Let's take this excellent opportunity to coin the term "meta-comfortable."
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| 6. |
the double bed
You will need a partner for this one. The goal is not so much comfort as an expression of sheer, unadulterated greed.
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| 7. |
the half-box
Any old box will do, but two of your feet - preferably on opposite sides of your body - must remain outside the container at all times.
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| 8. |
the backstroker
Do not even attempt unless you have tiny, tiny, precious little legs.
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| 10. |
the fur pile
For this, you will need at least three friends who are not averse to your sleeping on them.
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